Classic Halloween Tale to Tell: The Town Drunk

Late one dark and snowy night just outside Doncaster in Yorkshire, England Tom the town drunk was told for the third time by the bar keep that it was closing time. He awoke briefly and then laid his head back down on the sticky table. 

Impatient, the keeper hauled him up bodily and threw him out the pub’s door. The cold moist air hit his bones, shivering he rubbed his arms and stamped his feet. His brain still hazy he set out for home. But instead of turning right he turned left.

Completely turned around now he found himself meandering amongst the tombstones in the church graveyard. The wind whipped around him as he grabbed his thin coat closer to his body. 

Tom hearing what he thought was his name being called turned around but no one was there. He shook his head trying to clear his thoughts. Again he heard a voice calling his name. He stepped forward and tripped over a freshly dug pile of dirt.

His struggled to regain his balance but as he feet sunk into the loose soil he lost his balance and fell backwards into a deep gaping hole. 

Now lying prone in pitch darkness he heard his name spoken once more. As his eyes slowly adjusted to the dark he realized he must have fallen into a grave. He spotted a figure close by in the darkness with him. 

Thinking it must be Satan come for him he panicked as he heard his name called out yet again. He scrambled to his feet backing away from the figure. He grabbed at the dirt trying to climb up and out.

The dark figure stated, “ You can’t get out.”

Then he heard a moan. Tom shouted out in pure terror and leapt straight up in the air. He found himself gripping the edge of the grave with his hands. Desperate and afraid for his life he hauled himself up and ran home as fast as his shaking legs would take him.

Inside the dark hole, his neighbor Billy sighed in resignation. He, too, had fallen into the grave that night. He was relieved to see his old friend. But he wondered why Tom had not responded to his calls. 

When Tom landed at his feet he thought that with two they could manage to climb out. Now he had to wait until morning for the gravedigger to bring him a ladder.